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Saturday, February 19, 2011

Type A people living a Type B life

Mark & I were trying desperately to get a few things done today. We were both wandering around looking for tools or parts of what we needed to fix what we wanted. As we both ended up in the laundry room, scavenging through unorganized drawers of miscellaneous stuff, Mark says "this is like another episode of we are Gods entertainment." I say "what?" caught up in the crap we have accumulated and having no clue what half of it is or why we kept it I was barely hearing him. He explains "Us, this, we can't find anything we are looking for, can you imagine God right now, he is probably up there laughing at us, isn't this a good one, look at them wandering around, funny." I thought about what he said and laughed with him but quickly realized we were looking at the day totally differently. I was thrilled to be with him & to not have any crisis hanging over my head. We are so often in crisis, a peaceful day of trying to accomplish a few things seemed pretty nice to me. I wasn't mad or even all that frustrated by the disorganization of our stuff. It's not always like that though, sometimes I just want to scream it frustrates me so. We used to be Type A people, fairly organized, the house was generally always tidy & clean. I used to like to decorate for different seasons and holidays, even the little ones like St. Valentines Day. We both appreciate being on top of stuff, having paperwork done and laundry put away. When I start a project, I like to finish it, completely. Having Teale changed all that, she is completely unpredictable & we need to be flexible to get through life. Teale can suddenly be in crisis, not sleeping or having some sort of mental or physical issue that takes all our energy. I believe Mark & I have adjusted well to this. I believe we both struggle with it and sometimes wish for the calmness of a life we once had. But today, as I analyzed Mark's frustration, I realized how far I've come. I appreciate the little things more, like a day with my husband and children home and the peace in the house. Someday I know I will "catch up" and it will feel good to be living my Type A personality life again, but for today, I'll just be happy with what I do have, moments of peace, incredible patience and much love.

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