Wednesday, August 14, 2024

35 Years of Wedded Bliss

 On August 12, Mark and I celebrated 35 years of marriage. 35 years, wow, that just seems impossible to me. We were only 21 and 23 years old, when we decided to get married, a journey, that would last a lifetime. Before having kids, is tough to remember now, but we had six years, before we had our son. In those early years of marriage, we traveled a lot, seeing far away places, extravagantly, and camping too. Mark preformed in his band often, which brought together family and friends. His bands often played until the wee hours of the night. Then the next day would be lazy and quiet. We also saw a lot of local & nationally famous bands, music always being a passion. Mark used to golf, that’s tough to believe! I read countless books and learning things like cross stitch. Those early years were certainly charmed!

35 years later, I often reminisce about slower time in our life, before children. I feel like it was foundation building, having those years alone. It brought us together and made us closer. It gave us memories to look back upon, in the tougher days. 

When we were newly married, for our 35th anniversary, I may have imagined going on a big trip together. I may have thought we’d be well off and able to splurge on a fancy restaurant and night “on the town.” I may have imagined us giving each other extravagant gifts. 

None of that happened… We spent a quiet day together and we were grateful for that! 

Sunday, August 11, 2024

A Little Discipline

 I’m often reminded of a comment someone once said about Mark & I, behind our backs ~ “All Teale needs is a little discipline.” 

It got me thinking, how many thought it was Mark & I? Teale is severely brain damaged with several psychiatric issues. Discipline? What does that even mean? If we hit her, yell at her, take away her favorite things, she would learn how to control her chemical & physical imbalances? 

It made me wonder why anyone who has watched Mark & I struggle, while Teale suffers, would or could, possibly blame us? Also, is it really Teale who has to conform? What if we accepted people where they are, instead of trying to make them into something they are not? Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to have Teale more stable. But was her instability part of a plan to make us, who know her, more whole? Is she teaching us or are we teaching her? 

I’m just thinking out loud, but to go back to the original thought. I believe those who know & embrace Teale, have the chance to be better. I’m glad I never believed discipline was going to “fix her” because I think love, is what truly “fixed her.”