I
met Mark and Ellie 18 years ago when I was searching for a day care provider
for my daughter, Lea. Their easy-going spirit sold me - a husband/wife team and 10 happy children for Lea to grow
up with? Perfect. Mark and Ellie cared for each of their charges as though they
were their own. In fact, Mark was often asked when shopping at Wegmans if the
five or six kids hanging on to his shopping cart were all his. As my daughter moved
from baby to toddler, my friendship with Ellie grew stronger. I had many friends
in my life but only a few as special as Ellie and even fewer with a husband as kind
as Mark. Mark and Ellie were the whole package, so to speak.
Lea’s
father and I divorced when she was two – it was a difficult time of change and
adjustment and Mark and Ellie were very supportive of Lea and me. I left Lea at
their home every Monday – Friday knowing that as long as she was with this very
loving, family-focused couple, she would be okay. On the weekends, Mark and
Ellie invited us to Dinner Dogs concerts, parades, church functions and music festivals.
They never made me feel like a third wheel – Lea and Beau got along well and it
was so nice to have a couple to spend time with. One Saturday night, Ellie and
another day care mom took me out to a local nightclub now that I was single
again. Ellie laughed with me the whole way home over the number of times the
other mom said, “Oh my God, I could NEVER be single again.” Ellie truly
understood what I needed during this time in my life. Mark and Ellie friendship
gave me something unique – faith and lots of hope. They knew there was somebody
out there and I would find him when it was the right time. It was obvious the
love they shared with each other was something they wanted everyone to
experience.
As I
began dating again, I promised myself to never settle for anybody who didn’t
look at me the way that Mark looked at Ellie. Their marriage gave me a strong
example of what a good marriage looks like. They enjoyed spending time
together, they trusted each other, they supported each other in following
individual passions, they communicated with each other in a caring manner and
they laughed with each other often.
Mark
and Ellie celebrated with me when I did, in fact, marry that perfect guy and we
soon expanded our family with two more children. They cared for my son Mark –
whom we called Markie Mark or Little Mark in those days – and celebrated with
me when I told them I had decided to leave my job and stay home with the kids
once my third, Ryan, was born.
It’s
hard to believe we have been friends for 18 years and they have been married
for 25. How did time pass so quickly? Ellie and I have logged countless hours
on the phone discussing day-to-day news….sometimes during very, very difficult
times. During these times, when all seemed so overwhelming I knew without a
doubt that everything would be okay – it had to be, God had given so much to
this couple. Why would he not have easier times in store for them? I’m thrilled
that the ups and downs associated with the early years of parenting have passed
and Mark and Ellie are enjoying the true happiness and peace that is now
theirs.
When
I think about the role that Mark and Ellie’s relationship has played in my life,
I marvel at how far we have all come. Through all of the kid’s birthday
parties, the graduations and the times we have said good-bye for now to loved
ones at memorial services, our two families have fit together like a team,
being there for each other with love and support always. Ellie and I have joked
about being at a three future weddings together as mothers of the bride and
groom seeing that our three children are similar ages and opposite genders.
These conversations make our children roll their eyes in protest. I think what Ellie
and I are really commenting on when we talk that way is the knowledge that we
will always be a part of each other’s lives. Mike, Lea, Mark Ryan and I will
continue to celebrate their marriage milestones, their children’s
accomplishments and all the day-to-day simple things that true friendship
affords. As the years pass, I’m sure Ryan, the only one in our family who
didn’t experience Baby Macaroni day care first hand, will continue to ask, “Is
Beau really my cousin?” and “How are Mark and Ellie related to us?” To which I
will always answer, “They just are, buddy…they just are.”
